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I hate love, i hate falling in love. and i hate boys...becasue
they're the thing i want to love.
i hate having emotions, i wish that i could just cut off all my emotions
completely. that way i'd never have to feel any pain or sorrow again.
but i guess the happiness, the love i feel, the pleasure....is worth it.
or at least it's supposed to be.
there is this fear, and fear is probalby the worst emotion. I'd take
anger, saddness, pain...any day over fear.
because fear, eventually leads to all the other bad emotions.
i get angry cos i'm afraid, i'm sad because i'm afriad, and i suffer emense
pain because i'm afraid!
so what it all boils down to basically is, ryan i love you and it terrifies
the living daylights out of me.
and i want you to love me.....cos i'll be good to you. I promise
i would.....
but right now, i'm terrified.